I find I sometimes deceive myself.

For instance, someone says to me, "I want to be friends." In my mind, I translate their statement to "I want to be [close] friends."

Immediately I start expecting things of that person that I expect from close friends -- frequent communication, effort put into spending a fair bit of time together, open and frank dialogue -- and I am disappointed when I get less than that. I feel deceived.

The person might spend time with me now and again, talk to me a bit, keep up on some level with everything going on with me -- not necessarily acting as a close friend but certainly interacting with me as more than just a casual acquaintance.

In their mind, we have a friendship and it is exactly what they asked of me. They are living up to set expectations.

In my mind, however, because I read more into their original statement than they had meant, I feel let down.

I catch myself doing this sort of thing every now and again. It makes me wonder how often I do it without catching it. How many of my disappointments are really the product of my own internalizations? How often do I interpret things differently than they are meant and then feel misguidedly walked-upon when the situation doesn't pan out as I expect?

Once I realize my error (if I do realize my error), the negative feelings immediately begin to fade. The anger, hurt, and resentment slip away and I am more easily content.

I don't know how to make sure I understand people's statements more clearly. I think if I could do so, if I could be on the same page from the start, I would ultimately end up a happier person. Maybe people don't flake out as often as I tend to think they do? Perhaps instead, I misinterpret or misunderstand expectations that they communicate to me, which invariably leads to later misunderstandings and disappointments.