New processes implemented at work. I'm much busier, but much happier. They're helping smooth things out such that it's easier to get my work done and be more productive, and they're also positively affecting the way in which my officemate and I interract. Nice to have new processes actually help, instead of just bogging things down.
Happy happy me.
Thursday, September 18, 2003
Wednesday, September 17, 2003
My name was lost, and now is found.
Another Kathryn joined my group this week. She does essentially the same job I do. And she goes by Kathryn, no nicknames. I've always preferred Kathryn at work -- I like the formality -- but now it's starting to get confusing.
So today I called up the Company_B helpdesk to have them change my display name on the network to Kathy, and I started signing my emails as Kathy, as well. Crazy. I feel like a different person.
I decided to go with Kathy at work instead of Kat, even though Kat seems to be my preferred name socially right now -- I wanted some separation from my social life. At work, I'm Kathy. And it's just my job, not my life. When I go home at the end of the day, I'll be someone else, and that's where the living will begin.
Another Kathryn joined my group this week. She does essentially the same job I do. And she goes by Kathryn, no nicknames. I've always preferred Kathryn at work -- I like the formality -- but now it's starting to get confusing.
So today I called up the Company_B helpdesk to have them change my display name on the network to Kathy, and I started signing my emails as Kathy, as well. Crazy. I feel like a different person.
I decided to go with Kathy at work instead of Kat, even though Kat seems to be my preferred name socially right now -- I wanted some separation from my social life. At work, I'm Kathy. And it's just my job, not my life. When I go home at the end of the day, I'll be someone else, and that's where the living will begin.
I've been having disturbing dreams lately.
The other night, I dreamed that I was on an airplane. A girl on the plane was being raped. Several people had pulled her down onto the aisle floor and were undressing her, touching her, violating her against her will. Everyone else on the plane, maybe 10-15 passengers in all, while perhaps not actively involved, were still aware of what was going on. Many were actively supporting it.
I was sitting a little ways away, to the front and to the left of everything that was happening. I have this vivid picture in my mind of the girl looking at me in a moment of utter desperation. Our eyes met...
And then I looked away. Pretended I didn't see. Kind of like when you walk by a homeless person on the street, and you walk by not making eye contact, pretending as if you don't see, so that you don't have to deal with it.
I felt so dirty. I still do, and it wasn't even real. And even now, the picture of this girl looking to me for help is burned into my mind.
The other night, I dreamed that I was on an airplane. A girl on the plane was being raped. Several people had pulled her down onto the aisle floor and were undressing her, touching her, violating her against her will. Everyone else on the plane, maybe 10-15 passengers in all, while perhaps not actively involved, were still aware of what was going on. Many were actively supporting it.
I was sitting a little ways away, to the front and to the left of everything that was happening. I have this vivid picture in my mind of the girl looking at me in a moment of utter desperation. Our eyes met...
And then I looked away. Pretended I didn't see. Kind of like when you walk by a homeless person on the street, and you walk by not making eye contact, pretending as if you don't see, so that you don't have to deal with it.
I felt so dirty. I still do, and it wasn't even real. And even now, the picture of this girl looking to me for help is burned into my mind.
Sunday, September 14, 2003
This afternoon I pointed Brian to a link that I got quite a while back off of Salam Pax's blog, and then Brian linked it in one of his blog posts. I don't even know where Salam Pax got the link in the first place; I know he is an avid reader of any number of blogs, though, so it could have been anywhere. It's like Chutes and Ladders! Where will it go next?
A change of pace for Chris, who is apparently not a Lyle Lovett fan:
I don't wanna waste my time on simple little things
I'd rather stay here all the night with everyone who sings
Happy boys and happy girls will be
We are the happy boys and girls
Happy boys and happy girls will be
So happy yeah So so happy yeah
Happy boys and happy girls will be
We are the happy boys and girls
Happy boys and happy girls will be
Oh yeah
So happy
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